..............

i can't sleep. my mom was in my room trying to "talk" to me and then i saw this huge daddy long legs in a web at the foot of my bed. like if i had laid down it would've been right next to my feet. and so i was in hysterics telling her to get it out of my room. instead she told me to leave it alone and that it was small.

is that some cruel joke that's supposed to make me want to crawl onto the spider-free couch and die? also, she was lying. so she was like, nevermind, it is big. then she took her hand and brilliantly tried to WAVE IT AWAY. SO NOW IT IS DEEPER IN THERE. SOMEWHERE. HIDING. I CAN'T SEE IT. "the wind blew it outside," she said. real funny, mom. enough to make me want to pitchfork my innards.

it could be anywhere between my bed, the prime-spider-real-estate aisle of boxes, and the bathroom. which means i can't go to the bathroom. or to bed. which means i can't sleep. i'm not sleeping. at least not until i locate this thing and figure out a way to get rid of it without forming any sort of contact, especially of the eye and tactile variety.

i've told her so many times, i've told everyone so many times, that i have a crippling fear of insects and spiders. no one takes me seriously.

i hate you all.